Each year, as I plan the talks I will give on retreat and create practices for our group, I go where the Spirit leads, which is always exactly where we are meant to be and not always where I set out to go. That is part of the beauty of any retreat and of the spiritual life in general. If we are so set on where we think we need to be going and what we think we need to be doing, to the point that nothing else is considered, we are following our own spiritual plan, not necessarily God’s plan for us. We often have to get out of our own way and open ourselves up to possibility in order to see the next step on the path.

In this year’s retreat, the ­presentations and practices spanned the Catholic treasury of prayer. We practiced lectio divina (sacred reading) but also visio divina (sacred seeing), using icons, images and even nature. We dug down deep into silent contemplative prayer, something that harkens back to the beginning of our faith tradition, and used methods based on Centering Prayer, which comes out of “The Cloud of Unknowing,” a 14th century anonymous book and, in more recent years, the work of Trappist Father Thomas Keating. We shared how adoration is its own form of contemplation, one that puts us directly before Jesus in the Eucharist, adding a singular beauty and power to this style of prayer. We wrote poetry and created spiritual collages; we did yoga and went for meditative walks or paddles; we ate silent breakfast and sat in silent prayer as community.

But sometimes fear wins out. One person, ahead of the retreat, questioned how this could be a Catholic retreat if it included optional yoga (stretching). And then one person, new to Pyramid, questioned why this retreat was “so Catholic” and said that she didn’t know any Catholics who were talking about adoration, Liturgy of the Hours, lectio divina, or Thomas Merton — a mainstay of the Stillpoint community since my Pyramid experience was forged on the spiritual ground of Merton in the Mountains under the guidance of the wonderful and brilliant Walt Chura.

If one out of 30 people thinks the Stillpoint Retreat is not Catholic enough and one thinks it’s too Catholic, it’s probably exactly where it’s supposed to be. But what struck me even more in both of those instances was the opportunity that’s lost when we make assumptions and close ourselves off to possibility rather than see where the Spirit wants to take us.

When I went on my first silent Merton in the Mountains Retreat at Pyramid 12 years ago, I almost backed out when Walt told me we not only needed to remain silent but were not supposed to read, write or make casual eye contact. I decided to forge ahead, and I am so grateful I did. It opened my eyes to how many obstacles I put between myself and God, and it led me to a part of my spiritual journey I otherwise would have missed.

Don’t shut down wonder. God has so much in store just on the other side of fear. The Spirit is always teaching us, if we are willing to find our still point and just listen.

The next Stillpoint Retreat at Pyramid Life Center will be Sept. 5-7, 2025. What the Events page here for details.
This column originally appeared in the Sept. 12, 2024, issue of The Evangelist.

The post Don’t shut down wonder appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

Join me for the fifth-annual Stillpoint Retreat, which offers participants not only spiritual practices to help discover the divine in the everyday but the time and space to explore and dive deep. We will dabble in a little of everything: prayer, journaling, creativity, guided meditation, music, movement, and more.

The weekend is anchored by presentations to help you refocus your spiritual lives and guidance on how to put practices into place amid everyday life. Optional yoga classes will be offered both mornings. (Bring a yoga mat if you have one!) Our annual Saturday night bonfire (weather permitting) is a favorite way to connect with our growing Stillpoint community. A period of silence will be observed in the early mornings and through breakfast, providing another beautiful way to connect with the still, small voice of the Spirit.

My first experience of PLC was 15 years ago as a participant in the Merton in the Mountains silent retreat led by the beloved Walt Chura. Expect to find plenty of Merton (and quite a bit of Walt) in my Stillpoint retreat experience.

Cost: $205, all inclusive. You’ll get rustic accommodations at the always-beautiful Pyramid Life Center with its mountains and lake, island and waterfall. It’s a beautiful gem in the lower Adirondack Mountains, the kind of place you never want to leave and you always want to come back to. In addition, that price includes homemade meals, kayaking or canoeing, swimming (if it’s warm), and all retreat activities — from daily talks and reflections and optional daily yoga sessions to journaling and collage-as-prayer. Plenty of free time is built into the schedule for doing your own thing, in solitude or with a retreat friend.

Information and registration HERE.

The post Stillpoint Retreat: Creating calm amid life’s chaos appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

The post Finding Joy in the Waiting: An Online Advent Retreat appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

At no time is that inevitable cycle more obvious than during the autumn season, when we can look out our window and see the unbelievable beauty of trees on fire with reds and yellows and oranges. We stare in awe, knowing that this magnificence is only temporary and will be followed by a dying away, the starkness of barren limbs against a winter sky.

When I finished leading a retreat in the Adirondacks last month, I decided to end the weekend by squeezing in a paddle across the lake with a good friend. We have been spoiled in past years with herons taking off in flight before our eyes, loons floating alongside us, their calls beautiful and haunting, and even once an eagle soaring across the sky so fast we weren’t sure what we’d seen until after it was gone. Not to be outdone by the spectacular sights are the frogs hiding among the lilies, the tree that grows up out of a deep crack in a boulder or the dragonflies that dart by and every now and then pause on the point of a kayak like a prayer with wings.

This last time, however, the one loon we saw was skittish, diving under the water and moving away from us. Eventually we saw splashing and heard a cry unlike any other. We paddled closer and saw the loon was in some sort of distress. We thought maybe he had something caught around his neck and headed back to land to find help.

What we learned was that this loon’s sibling had been found dead that morning. This was distress, indeed, just not the physical kind. My friend asked if I thought it was a bad sign, and I quickly said, No! Maybe too quickly, as though I didn’t want to consider it, because it was in the back of my mind. As I drove home, I found myself thinking about the Canticle of Brother Sun and Sister Moon, written by St. Francis of Assisi, whose feast we celebrate this month.

“Praised be You my Lord with all Your creatures, especially Sir Brother Sun, who is the day through whom You give us light,” the prayer begins, working its way through all the glories of our amazing world, from wind and water to fire and flowers. By the end we get to “Sister Death, from whom no-one living can escape.”

Our world makes us think if we try hard enough, worry enough, we can keep the tally of “bad” things in our life on the low side, but we are not in control. There will always be seasons to mourn, just as there will always follow seasons to dance. Our job is not to look for ways to ward it off but to learn to surrender to what is rather than what we think should be.

When I paddled across that lake, I thought I should get something that would make my heart leap, a sight that would somehow seal the weekend as a success in a spectacular way. Instead, I was met by a mournful cry and the primitive ache of loss, reminding me that there is beauty even in the fading. Just look out the window, and watch the leaves let go.

This column originally appeared in the Oct. 5, 2022, issue of Catholic New York.

The post Beauty Even in the Fading appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

To be honest, I almost skipped the overnight trip to Pyramid Life Center in Paradox, N.Y., because I thought maybe I should just stay home and take care of the responsibilities in front of me. But my better angels won out, and I packed my life vest and hiking boots and headed north. As soon as I turned onto the long road that cuts through the woods and leads to the lake, my shoulders relaxed and I said (out loud), “Home.” Because this sacred spot that has become a regular destination when I’m in need of spiritual renewal—and where I lead a retreat every September—really does feel like a soul home, a thin place where God’s presence is palpable.

At a time when the news coming at us from every corner of our country and world is beginning to cause a collective sense of hopelessness (at least based on conversations I’m having), stepping outside our routine can help break that cycle and remind us that no matter what is happening around us, there is always beauty to be found.

Oftentimes, all that’s required to make that shift is intentional silence—no kayak or lake required. It can be a little more challenging to do that right where we are, but it’s worth the effort. What does it entail? Simply finding a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed, and being willing to silence your phone, turn off the TV, and go inward. If you can add a little natural beauty—your backyard, a pocket park, even a beautiful view spied at 55 MPH from a car window—all the better.

When I lived in the Pelham Bay section of the Bronx many years ago, I found so much joy in the beautiful maple tree just beyond the fire escape outside my window. Today it’s the towering oaks in my backyard in upstate New York that keep me anchored and aware. Find a spot that speaks to you.

What do you do once you get there? You wait for the still, small voice, just as Elijah did (1Kings 19:12). It can be a challenge at first, so start with just a few minutes at a time. If it suits you, read some Scripture and contemplate a line that speaks to you (known as lectio divina), but don’t be afraid to do absolutely nothing. You’ll be surprised how healing it can be.

Years ago, I wrote about my early forays into this sort of meditative prayer, and an editor slapped a headline on it using the term “navel-gazing.” It was meant to be derogatory, and it served as a reminder (at least to me) that too many people out there see silence and self-reflection as a waste of time or self-indulgent; it is anything but.

It is only when we sit face-to-face with God in silence—gazing into our own hearts (not our navels)—that Spirit will speak to us. If we’re always talking, running, doing, there’s nowhere for God to get a word in edgewise. But, when we stop all the doing and take time to just be, whether it’s in the middle of a quiet lake or from our seat on a crowded commuter train, God speaks, beauty surfaces, and we are found.

Mary will lead the next Stillpoint retreat at Pyramid Life Center Sept. 9-11, 2022. For more information, visit the Events page.

This column originally appeared in the July 1, 2022, issue of Catholic New York. Copyright Mary DeTurris Poust, 2022.

The post Finding your soul home appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

The retreat is $175, all-inclusive. What does that mean? You’ll get rustic accommodations at the always-beautiful Pyramid Life Center with its mountains and lake, island and waterfall. It’s a beautiful gem in the lower Adirondack Mountains, the kind of place you never want to leave and you always want to come back to. In addition, that price includes homemade meals, kayaking or canoeing, swimming (if it’s warm), and all retreat activities — from daily talks and reflections and optional daily yoga sessions to journaling and collage-as-prayer, plus a Saturday night bonfire, weather permitting. Plenty of free time is built into the schedule for doing your own thing, in solitude or with a retreat friend.

Here are a few comments from some folks who joined me for the Stillpoint retreat at Pyramid in years past:

“Who would think that spiritual renewal could be so much fun? You get the best of everything at the Stillpoint retreat! Meditation, prayer, inspiring talks which lead to sharing, time to hike, kayak, attend Mass, yoga. Lifetime friendships are made all in the backdrop of splendorous Pyramid Lake! Cannot wait for next year!”  — Karen

“Mary has chosen an ideal destination of beauty and seclusion at Pyramid Life Center in the Adirondacks, for a weekend of respite from everyday bustle and strain. She gently introduces multiple avenues toward peaceful renewal including her own insights, well-chosen readings emphasizing self-nurturing and acceptance, acknowledging gratitude with everyday life occurrences, yoga, sharing, and silent mindful reflection. There is freedom to explore or relax in the natural splendor of the lake, the hills and surrounding wooded trails, with loon song, brilliant stars and the scent and cradle of the woods.” — Margie

“This weekend was a gift! Thank you to Mary, the other retreatants, Brian and his staff for a wonderful experience!” — Ann

“This weekend’s Stillpoint retreat left me reflective, spirit filled and in a better place than I was a few days ago! Thanks to Mary, all participants and PLC staff!” — Cherie

“Mary- it truly was an amazing experience this past weekend and you planted so many seeds with your knowledge and passion. I’m already doing my homework and looking up this and that and continuing my stillness in my routine. I am grateful and wish many blessings for all.” — Kristen

“Thank you, Mary, for another phenomenal retreat! I will hold it in my heart through the year.” — Eileen

Registration link is HERE (opens in a new tab). Scroll down until you see the Stillpoint listing. See you at Pyramid!

There’s a chair with your name on it. What are you waiting for?

The post Registration is open for Stillpoint Retreat Sept. 9-11 appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

The retreat is $175, all-inclusive. What does that mean? You’ll get rustic accommodations at the always-beautiful Pyramid Life Center with its mountains and lake, island and waterfall. It’s a beautiful gem in the lower Adirondack Mountains, the kind of place you never want to leave and you always want to come back to. In addition, that price includes homemade meals, kayaking or canoeing, swimming (if it’s warm), and all retreat activities — from daily talks and reflections and optional daily yoga sessions to journaling and collage-as-prayer. Plenty of free time is built into the schedule for doing your own thing, in solitude or with a retreat friend.

Here are a few comments from some folks who joined me for the Stillpoint retreat at Pyramid in 2020:

“Honest, this was one of the best weekends all fall for me.”

“…wonderful, uplifting and healing weekend nurtured by Mary and the amazing PLC staff. I have known PLC for over 30 years but now will ‘see’ it in a newly expanded way. Thank you all for your sharing, thoughts, laughter, and your presence at this Thin Space as we travel on our Pilgrim Journey together. I felt the presence of Soul Friends among you.”

“One week ago today I was checking into heaven! Not literally, of course, but if I had to describe heaven, it would be:
Beautiful surroundings
Beautiful souls, like minded souls
Laughter ( when we weren’t silent, of course )
Learning more of what we’ve come to love, prayer, meditation
Doing something new ( for me, yoga )
The Eucharist,
Meeting new friends
Delicious food
Beautiful weather, warm sun, starlight at night
And a promise to return”

Registration link is HERE. Scroll down until you see the Stillpoint listing. See you at Pyramid!

The post Stillpoint retreat Sept. 10-12 open for registration appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

I was lucky enough to be seated at meals—due to Covid our movements were restricted in the dining hall—with a lovely woman named Margie, who left a deep imprint on my heart and soul. A retired occupational therapist, she practically glowed with peace and grace, holiness and joy. When I asked about her life, she leaned in as if sharing a secret and said, “Ever since I retired, I’m like a kid in a candy store. I wake up every morning and say, ‘What am I going to do today?!?’” At that moment I leaned in and said to her, “I want to be you when I grow up.” And I do.

I watched as she headed out on challenging hikes, often leading the way for others, or hauled her lightweight kayak to the lake at all hours to paddle through mist and fog, at sunrise and sunset, capturing photos of lilies and spiderwebs, shimmering water and deep green mosses to share with our community. She recounted tales of a week spent in an Italian village north of Venice last year and showed us the beautiful hand-painted necklace made by a Benedictine nun she met there. This is a woman who draws you to her, and you never want to let go.

How easy it would have been for me to miss out on the joy and beauty that is Margie. Had we not been seated together at meals—the Spirit at work, for sure—or had we been too busy to connect at different times that weekend, we might have walked away not knowing what we missed, but, oh, what a loss that would have been.

What does all of this have to do with anyone other than me and Margie? Everything. When we take the time to notice, to listen, to share, we discover kindred spirits who lift us up and help carry us forward, especially during these challenging times. So many of the people on my retreat—some of whom I’ve known for a long time—taught me beautiful lessons, leaving me in laughter one minute and tears (the good kind) the next. We were a group of mostly strangers at the start but a beloved family by the end. We don’t have to go on retreat to find that; it is always right there for the taking. We just have to open our eyes—and our hearts—to what’s around us every single day.

Are you willing to embrace the life you’re given, looking for every last opportunity to learn, to experience, to give? Can you step beyond your fear and worry to see the beauty and joy that is just below the surface, maybe outside in God’s great creation, maybe sitting next to you at a lunch table, maybe in the next cubicle at work? Can you wake up tomorrow, clap your hands together with joy and anticipation and say, “What will I do today?”

This column originally appeared in the Oct. 7, 2020, issue of Catholic New York.

The post Seeing every day as an opportunity appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

After months of wondering whether my retreat would be on or off due to COVID-19, I am happy to report that it is ON, and Pyramid Life Center is ready to receive guests and offer us a safe and socially distanced atmosphere. We’ve got nine 20 people signed up for this retreat so far, which means there are very few slots left in order for us to keep this gathering small and in line with health protocols. Of course, small groups make for more intimate and powerful retreats anyway, so… win-win.

Stillpoint: Creating Calm amid the Chaos will be offered Friday, Sept. 11, through Sunday, Sept. 13. It will be a weekend to nourish body, mind, and soul as we enter into the beautiful fall season at Pyramid Life Center. Check-in is at 5 p.m. on Friday; the retreat concludes at 2 p.m. on Sunday.

This retreat will focus around the theme of “meditation in motion” and will include practices to help us discover the divine in the everyday, the miracles in the mundane moments of life. Optional yoga classes will be offered for those who are interested, as well as collage-as-prayer, journaling and more. Participants can also personalize this retreat by creating prayer practices around their own interests — photography, hiking, kayaking — in the abundant free time that will be scheduled into our weekend. This will be a semi-silent retreat: silent breakfasts and silent evenings after our closing sessions. (For those who want deeper silence, there is the option to take all meals in silence.)

The cost is $150, which includes the retreat program, rustic accommodations and all meals, as well as access to kayaks, hiking trails, and plenty of Adirondack chairs for resting and daydreaming. It’s a truly beautiful physical location with a gorgeous lake, mountains, loons, herons and more. To register, click HERE and look for Stillpoint in the dropdown menu.

Pyramid Life Center is operating according to COVID-19 health requirements, with social distancing enforced through facilities. You will be screened as you enter. Don’t forget your mask and your hand sanitizer!

The post A mountain retreat: Find your stillpoint appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

So that beautiful blossom you see here? We all know what’s just on the other side of surrender. Blossoming, beauty, transformation. The same is true for us, if we trust the process. This week, can you loosen your grip and let go enough to begin the transformation. It doesn’t have to be all at once. Even just a small loosening will allow your petals to unfurl. Blossom today, right where you are planted.

And now, on to the rest of our show.

Bookshelf: I always have multiple books going, usually a few different types. I can only read one novel at a time, and at this point that novel is The Magician’s Assistant by Ann Patchett. This book has been sitting on my bookshelf unread for years. Not sure why. But, last week, when I was going remote camping, I needed something light and okay to get wet, so I decided that was the book. I’m loving it, but I’ve always loved Ann Patchett. (If you haven’t read State of Wonder, go get it and dive in. So amazing.) I am also just starting Mary Karr’s The Art of Memoir, which I picked up at at Dove & Hudson used books in Albany recently. It had been on my Amazon Wish List for years. Now it’s on my nightstand. I’ve become a big fan of memoir in the past couple of years. I can’t imagine I’ll ever write one, but I’m intrigued by how others do.

Soundtrack: I haven’t been listening to a ton of music lately, but when I do it’s often the new Taylor Swift album, Folklore. It’s a beautiful album. Even if you’re not typically a Swiftie, it’s worth checking out. I also tend to listen to a lot of spiritual music that verges on weird. Okay, it’s straight up weird. Wahe Guru by White Sun is one of my current favorites. I find it so soothing. Sometimes I just tell Alexa to play it while I’m making the bed or getting dressed. Calms my nerves. Now, what I AM listening to regularly, are my latest Audible selections. I just finished I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou — and read by Maya Angelou. Powerful, poetic, painful. If you have never read this book, I highly recommend listening to Maya tell her story. I’m following that up with Present over Perfect by Shauna Niequest. Another beautiful book, one I wish I would have written. As the title suggests, it’s about being present in our own lives in a very God-centered way. I may buy the hard copy after I finish the audio version.

Viewfinder: So much beauty out there in the world, despite the challenges we all face, individually and collectively, these days. I cannot get enough of the Rose of Sharon in my backyard and the birds and bees flying around and entertaining me on a full-time basis. Here are a couple of shots from the yard:

Menu: Lots of fresh produce this time of year, so that means lots of good meals, some cooked over a campfire. (A special kind of awesome.) Just yesterday I made Giambotta, which is the Italian version of Ratatouille, a vegetable stew chock full of summer goodness: eggplant, zucchini, green beans, fire-roasted tomatoes, mushrooms, onions, and garlic, of course. Oh and lots of fresh basil torn up and thrown in at the last minute. You can serve it over crusty bread, over rice or couscous, or over pasta, as was our preference (big surprise). Here’s a photo of the end result:

GPS: We did not get to do a family vacation this year due to COVID, so that was a great disappointment, but I was lucky enough to be able to catch a few days of mother-daughter camping with Chiara up in the Adirondack Mountains. We spent one day at Pyramid Life Center before heading to a remote camp site nearby. What makes it remote? We have to bring all our gear in by canoe and kayak. We paddle everything across the lake, firewood included, and set up camp in a beautiful little spot where we can listen to the loons as we sleep in our tent at night, float around in crystal clear water, read as we swing in a travel hammock or sit by the fire, and generally forget the real world. There is zero cell service, which is a beautiful thing. And I get to spend quality time with my daughter and another mom-daughter duo.

Datebook: Some good news on the datebook front. Finally after months of quarantine and social distancing. The retreat I’m leading at Pyramid Life Center in September is ON. I have nine people signed up so far. Room for about 10 more while maintaining social distance requirements. Stillpoint: Creating Calm amid the Chaos will be offered Sept. 11-13 at the always beautiful Pyramid Life Center. It will be semi-silent (silent breakfasts and evenings after closing talks). There will be an opportunity for kayaking, hiking, collaging, journaling, praying, talking, and, above all, resting and renewing. The cost is only $150 and that includes the retreat, rustic accommodations, and all meals, all in a socially distanced setting. Below is a photo from my recent visit to Pyramid and one from a previous retreat. Sign up HERE if you’re interested (just scroll down in the dropdown until you see Stillpoint), or shoot me an email if you have additional questions.

The post Manic Monday: Blossom where you are planted appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.