When I got home from the hospital on Friday, I wrote my usual three things in my gratitude journal before bed and realized I was nearing the end of that particular notebook. I decide having a new lease on life was a good time to start the next journal in my ongoing series. As you can see from the image, I wrapped up the current journal at 7,734 things for which I am grateful. In recent years, I continue the count with each new journal, so that number represents about seven years of gratitude. But in the past I used to keep journals and start new counts at one each time. So… in total I have more than 10,000 blessings noted in various journals.

I wasn’t always as faithful to the practice as I am now, but I always came back to it because it works. Some of my notebooks date back to when my kids were little. There are beautiful little snapshots of moments in our lives that I took the time to write down. Not always big things. Sometimes something as simple as making a snowman, sipping cocoa, finger painting in the kitchen. Or as in recent days, sometimes something as big as someone helping my blood keep flowing through my arteries. It takes only a few minutes each night to write down three things for which you are grateful, but is a transforming practice. Try it; you won’t regret it. It is amazing how seeking beauty and blessing in your daily life — no matter what else is going on — can shift your world view from one of lack to one of abundance. It is a complete gift and grace.

If you’d like to read more about this practice, you can go HERE for a previous post.

Or listen to my podcast on the importance of gratitude HERE.

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Gratitude is a transformative practice. Put into daily rotation in our spiritual lives, it can remake us in all the best ways. When we are grateful for all that we have, not just in good times but all the time, we begin to see blessings where we hadn’t seen them before; we begin to live life from a place of abundance rather than a place of lack. Suddenly a walk through the grocery store or a drive to the office becomes an opportunity for grace, gratitude, and the awareness of God’s undeniable presence in the middle of our messy lives.

Mary DeTurris Poust, “Small-but-Powerful Words,” from the November 2022 issue of Give Us This Day, www.giveusthisday.org (Collegeville, MN: Liturgical Press, 2022). Used with permission.

Photo by Daniel Andrade on Unsplash

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Most recently I was asked to lead a retreat for moms at Our Lady of Mount Carmel Parish in northern New Jersey. I marveled that so many young mothers — some with babies in carriers, others bringing little ones to the nursery — came out for the morning event. I remember how difficult it was to make time for spiritual pursuits when I was raising my three children. But these moms — with the help of their parish — were prioritizing their spiritual lives, which is good news for them and for all of us. When I met Linda, the woman who had founded the parish group 30 years ago, and Maureen, another soul sister I’d previously met only on social media, I felt as though I’d been welcomed into a spiritual sorority where we were already pledged to the One who defines our being. So much grace.

From there, I drove west to visit a friend I’d met almost 40 years ago, when we both worked for the Diocese of Metuchen, N.J. Dorothy, who had spent almost 30 years as a cloistered nun, was a laywoman running an evangelization office when I met her. Almost 30 years my senior, she became a dear friend and mentor. As we embraced after too many years between visits, it was as though no time had passed at all. Our visit was set to a holy rhythm. We prayed together before meals, said Night Prayer before bed, and went to Mass together in the morning. Dorothy is once again a Catholic sister, having renewed her vows, and I was blessed to be in her presence, to soak up her wisdom, to marvel at her absolute trust in the Lord, and to share so much laughter and joy. Grace upon grace.

I returned home from my road trip to a lunch outing with one long-time friend followed by a fall foliage hike the next day with another local soul sister. The day after that I taught one of my three weekly yoga classes and felt my heart filled to bursting with love for the students who have become friends. When I sit on my mat while they are in their final resting pose, breathing and making space for the still small voice, I sometimes look out and feel so much beautiful spiritual energy and love in that room that I am close to tears. Undeserved grace in unlikely places.

The more I think about it, the more I realize that these beautiful people who seem to surround me on all sides these days didn’t just arrive in my life suddenly. They have always been there. It’s just that I was only able to see and appreciate them when I was willing to poke through the cocoon I’d wrapped around myself and tentatively unfold the wings of grace that are ours for the asking.

The world can be a beautiful but difficult place; there is no need to go it alone. Jesus sent his disciples out two by two for a reason. We need each other. When we open ourselves up to that reality, we find grace and gratitude around every corner.
Where is grace hiding in plain sight in your life today? Take a risk. Spread your wings. Your tribe is waiting.

This column originally appeared in the Nov. 3, 2022, issue of The Evangelist.

Photo by Hannah Busing on Unsplash

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At no time is that inevitable cycle more obvious than during the autumn season, when we can look out our window and see the unbelievable beauty of trees on fire with reds and yellows and oranges. We stare in awe, knowing that this magnificence is only temporary and will be followed by a dying away, the starkness of barren limbs against a winter sky.

When I finished leading a retreat in the Adirondacks last month, I decided to end the weekend by squeezing in a paddle across the lake with a good friend. We have been spoiled in past years with herons taking off in flight before our eyes, loons floating alongside us, their calls beautiful and haunting, and even once an eagle soaring across the sky so fast we weren’t sure what we’d seen until after it was gone. Not to be outdone by the spectacular sights are the frogs hiding among the lilies, the tree that grows up out of a deep crack in a boulder or the dragonflies that dart by and every now and then pause on the point of a kayak like a prayer with wings.

This last time, however, the one loon we saw was skittish, diving under the water and moving away from us. Eventually we saw splashing and heard a cry unlike any other. We paddled closer and saw the loon was in some sort of distress. We thought maybe he had something caught around his neck and headed back to land to find help.

What we learned was that this loon’s sibling had been found dead that morning. This was distress, indeed, just not the physical kind. My friend asked if I thought it was a bad sign, and I quickly said, No! Maybe too quickly, as though I didn’t want to consider it, because it was in the back of my mind. As I drove home, I found myself thinking about the Canticle of Brother Sun and Sister Moon, written by St. Francis of Assisi, whose feast we celebrate this month.

“Praised be You my Lord with all Your creatures, especially Sir Brother Sun, who is the day through whom You give us light,” the prayer begins, working its way through all the glories of our amazing world, from wind and water to fire and flowers. By the end we get to “Sister Death, from whom no-one living can escape.”

Our world makes us think if we try hard enough, worry enough, we can keep the tally of “bad” things in our life on the low side, but we are not in control. There will always be seasons to mourn, just as there will always follow seasons to dance. Our job is not to look for ways to ward it off but to learn to surrender to what is rather than what we think should be.

When I paddled across that lake, I thought I should get something that would make my heart leap, a sight that would somehow seal the weekend as a success in a spectacular way. Instead, I was met by a mournful cry and the primitive ache of loss, reminding me that there is beauty even in the fading. Just look out the window, and watch the leaves let go.

This column originally appeared in the Oct. 5, 2022, issue of Catholic New York.

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So here we are in Week 1 of our daily efforts to journey inward and discover our true selves and create transformation along the way. If you missed the first post on this, you can find it HERE. It will tell you what to pack for this journey (hint: If you have a spiral notebook, you’re pretty much good to go. The rest can be collected along the way.) The one “requirement,” and I use that term loosely, is a gratitude journal, because, trust me, it is such an easy way to begin to shift our attitude, and it’s really nice to be able to go back and look at all the blessings in our lives rather than journals filled with angst and woe. So today I thought I would start with that basic daily activity: gratitude journaling.

What does it look like? Whatever you want it to look like. Seriously. You can buy yourself the most beautiful leather journal with homemade paper; you can use a 10-cent spiral notebook picked up at last year’s back-to-school sale; you can even use a great big mason jar or some other container and squares of brightly colored paper. So many options!

Okay, now that we’ve got the actual journal, what do we do? Well, there are lots of ways you can choose to do this, but I’ll tell you my way, which is quick and so easy I (almost) never say, “Nah, I don’t have time.” Every night before I climb into bed, I take the spiral journal from my nightstand and date the entry. Then I write down three things from that day that I count among my blessings. (I number them consecutively so I can see them adding up over the months. It’s a banner day when I hit a milestone, like 3,000, which I did last month!) Sometimes the entries are so simple (the smell of coffee brewing in the morning) and other times sublime (someone getting a good diagnosis). Most days it’s somewhere in between. Once you start this practice, you’ll find yourself noticing things as you go about your day and thinking, “Oh, I can’t forget to write that down tonight.” Of course, you can always jot down those blessings as you go — on your phone, in a planner, whatever is handy. When I do notice something like that and I’m not near my journal, I often speak the blessing or happy moment out loud to memorialize it in some way. It makes it more real (and less likely I’ll forget it when I get to bedtime).

Here’s a sample from a recent entry:

• A big white moon in a bright blue morning sky

• A flock of birds flying in unison over and over right above my car in the Pastoral Center parking lot

• Everyone home for dinner

And here is a day’s entry pulled from the archives from 2006 (told you I’ve been doing this sort of thing for a while):

• For the dark, stark winter landscape of my backyard against the white night snow

• Watching “Magic School Bus” with Noah this afternoon

• For my home

So, today, this week, try to seek out the beauty and blessings around you, the miracles in your midst. Did something make you smile? Did something touch your heart? Did you just look out into your yard or across a room and spy something that made you happy or made you feel grateful. Write it down. The best part of this is that you don’t have to be a writer or a poet or a meditator or any of those potentially scary things. You just need a pen, a piece of paper and the willingness to notice the world around you in a more intentional way.

Try to go through your days with attention and INtention. This is the first step to reVolution, evolution, transformation and joy. Join me. And, if you’d like, share your experiences with this practice in the comment section. If you miss a day or two or ten, just pick it up and begin again. Always be willing to begin again. You don’t have to wait for a magical date on the calendar. Every day is an opportunity to start over. And isn’t that something to write down in a gratitude journal!

If you keep at this practice, it will slowly change how you see the world around you, and it really will make you more grateful for everything in your life, less likely to complain about the little annoyances, and more compassionate to the people around you. It doesn’t happen all at once, but little by little, day by day, year by year. Just begin and see what happens. If you write down three things every day, you will surpass 1,000 blessings in a year.

I’ve been writing about gratitude journaling for years (decades?), so if you’d like to read some of my previous stories and posts on this, you can start HERE.

You can also find me talking about this topic over on my podcast, Life Lines with Mary DeTurris Poust. Click HERE for that.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. Remember to begin again each day. There is no start date, no end date, no “goal” you have to hit. Just begin. And then begin again.

Peace and Love,
Mary

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So here we are in Week 1 of our daily efforts to journey inward and discover our true selves and create transformation along the way. If you missed the first post on this, you can find it HERE. It will tell you what to pack for this journey (hint: If you have a spiral notebook, you’re pretty much good to go. The rest can be collected along the way.) The one “requirement,” and I use that term loosely, is a gratitude journal, because, trust me, it is such an easy way to begin to shift our attitude, and it’s really nice to be able to go back and look at all the blessings in our lives rather than journals filled with angst and woe. So today I thought I would start with that basic daily activity: gratitude journaling.

What does it look like? Whatever you want it to look like. Seriously. You can buy yourself the most beautiful leather journal with homemade paper; you can use a 10-cent spiral notebook picked up at last year’s back-to-school sale; you can even use a great big mason jar or some other container and squares of brightly colored paper. So many options!

Okay, now that we’ve got the actual journal, what do we do? Well, there are lots of ways you can choose to do this, but I’ll tell you my way, which is quick and so easy I (almost) never say, “Nah, I don’t have time.” Every night before I climb into bed, I take the spiral journal from my nightstand and date the entry. Then I write down three things from that day that I count among my blessings. (I number them consecutively so I can see them adding up over the months. It’s a banner day when I hit 1,000 or even 2,000 in a single journal, which I did back in December.) Sometimes the entries are so simple (the smell of coffee brewing in the morning) and other times sublime (someone getting a good diagnosis). Most days it’s somewhere in between. Once you start this practice, you’ll find yourself noticing things as you go about your day and thinking, “Oh, I can’t forget to write that down tonight.” Of course, you can always jot down those blessings as you go — on your phone, in a planner, whatever is handy. When I do notice something like that and I’m not near my journal, I often speak the blessing or happy moment out loud to memorialize it in some way. It makes it more real (and less likely I’ll forget it when I get to bedtime).

Here’s a sample from my own journal on Jan. 30, 2019:

• A plane, lights blinking, cutting across the night sky

• Two crows circling overhead gracefully in the morning

• Watching Chiara compete on bars

And here is a day’s entry pulled from the archives from that same date in 2006 (told you I’ve been doing this sort of thing for a while):

• For the dark, stark winter landscape of my backyard against the white night snow

• Watching “Magic School Bus” with Noah this afternoon

• For my home

So, today, this week, try to seek out the beauty and blessings around you, the miracles in your midst. Did something make you smile? Did something touch your heart? Did you just look out into your yard or across a room and spy something that made you happy or made you feel grateful. Write it down. The best part of this is that you don’t have to be a writer or a poet or a meditator or any of those potentially scary things. You just need a pen, a piece of paper and the willingness to notice the world around you in a more intentional way.

Try to go through your days with attention and INtention. This is the first step to reVolution, evolution, transformation and joy. Join me. And, if you’d like, share your experiences with this practice in the comment section. If you miss a day or two or ten, just pick it up and begin again. Always be willing to begin again. You don’t have to wait for a magical date on the calendar. Every day is an opportunity to start over. And isn’t that something to write down in a gratitude journal!

If you keep at this practice, it will slowly change how you see the world around you, and it really will make you more grateful for everything in your life, less likely to complain about the little annoyances, and more compassionate to the people around you. It doesn’t happen all at once, but little by little, day by day, year by year. Just begin and see what happens. If you write down three things every day, you will surpass 1,000 blessings in a year.

I’ve been writing about gratitude journaling for years (decades?), so if you’d like to read some of my previous stories and posts on this, you can start HERE

I hope to podcast on this topic later this week. I’ll be sure to share that recording if/when that happens.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. Remember to begin again each day. There is no start date, no end date, no “goal” you have to hit. Just begin. And then begin again.

Peace and Love,
Mary

The post Week 1: Begin. Begin Again. Begin Always. appeared first on Not Strictly Spiritual.

As we move through the next few weeks toward the Christmas celebration that will be the pinnacle of our preparations—the prayers said, the presents wrapped, the homes decorated— we are being given a rare opportunity to stay put, slow down, simplify and find hope even amid the challenges thrown in our path every day. It’s not something that can happen without our willing participation, however. We have to commit to it, to seek out beauty right where we are, to soak in the moments of awe in the ordinary, to name the gifts in our midst in an intentional way. And, when we find ourselves losing hope, to return to prayer and begin again. We can always begin again.

I say all of this not as an expert but as a companion on the journey. Trust me, I don’t have this down pat. Far from it. But I know from experience that something shifts when I commit to intentional living and gratitude for what is rather than focus on what I think should be. My heart softens, my breathing slows, my nerves settle and suddenly there is beauty all around me.

So, where do we begin? With gratitude. Not just in our heads or in silent prayer, but in concrete ways—in a notebook, on your phone, on slips of paper collected in a glass jar. It’s so simple it seems insignificant, maybe even silly. How can this shift anything? It can and it will. Just begin. Every day write down three things for which you are grateful. It doesn’t have to be earth-shattering. In fact, the more simple and ordinary, the better. I was driving to work one day and spied two bright pink Adirondack chairs on the second story balcony of a little gray house. The pop of color in my dreary day made me smile. Later that night, I wrote it in my journal. Crescent moons, raindrops on the roof, an old man walking his dog, the smell of soup simmering on the stove—it’s all fodder for joy. It begins with noticing and giving thanks for the everyday miracles. Of course, you’ll want to include the big things too—the good diagnosis, the job found, the children safe. Big and small, begin to keep count.

The 13th-century German mystic Meister Eckhart once said, “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is, ‘Thank you,’ it will be enough.” Gratitude in any form is prayer, and that is a great beginning, but we need to go further. Look at your prayer practices. Where can you add to it this season? An Advent wreath on the kitchen table for mealtime prayers, perhaps? A Bible beside your bed for morning or evening reflection? A small sacred space near your favorite chair for moments of silent prayer in the presence of God?

This Advent, commit to the spiritual self-care that will not only soothe your soul during these difficult days but will transform your life from the inside out. Little by little, you’ll find that the outside world, with its bad news and daily threats, can’t shake the quiet joy that lives in your heart. The secular world has never really understood Advent, which is such a loss, because now more than ever our world needs the joyful hope that comes from being willing to wait, to watch, to find the miracle hidden in plain sight, no overnight shipping or gift wrap required.

This column originally appeared in the December 2, 2020, issue of Catholic New York.

Photo by Anne Nygård on Unsplash

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I write every night. Okay, almost every night. I don’t usually take that journal with me on trips because it’s too big, and every once in a while when I sit down to write I just can’t. Not because there were no blessings that day but because I’m in such an off mood it feels like my doing it for show would tarnish the “project.” You don’t have to be a mathematician to figure out that three multiplied by 365 is more than 1,000. So you can hit this number in less than a year if you start today. it’s so worth it. Trust me.

This isn’t my first gratitude rodeo, by the way. I’ve had multiple gratitude journals over the years. I’ve written about the practice, promoted it in blog posts and books and columns. Because it really works to change your attitude from one of lack to one of abundance. And it doesn’t all have to be over-the-top joy or benchmark blessings. In fact, it shouldn’t be. This is a practice in finding the blessing in the little things — the smell of fresh cut grass, the finch sitting on the feeder, the sound of rain on the sunporch roof, the kids laughing together at the kitchen table. And and of course there are big blessings, too, the ones that make us weep with joy that are not so easy to forget even if we don’t write them down.

Get yourself a notebook. Begin today. Just three little things. It doesn’t have to be a fancy notebook. It doesn’t have to be prose or poetry. It doesn’t have to be pretty. But just begin. And see where you are three months from now, six months, one year. I look back at my old gratitude journals and they are like snapshots into my life. It brings me such joy. I hope it does the same for you.

If you’d like to read some of my longer articles on the gratitude habit, you can find my OSV feature story on gratitude HERE and my Life Lines column HERE. I have lots more on gratitude on the blog. Just search “gratitude” and you’ll have more than enough to keep you busy. And, oh, I am grateful ever day for you! Thank you for being here on this journey with me.

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