{"id":2518,"date":"2013-06-18T20:05:24","date_gmt":"2013-06-19T00:05:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/notstrictlyspiritual.com\/?p=2518"},"modified":"2022-04-25T21:25:16","modified_gmt":"2022-04-26T01:25:16","slug":"getting-past-the-churchs-gatekeepers-whos-minding-the-store","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/notstrictlyspiritual.com\/faith\/getting-past-the-churchs-gatekeepers-whos-minding-the-store\/","title":{"rendered":"Getting past the Church’s gatekeepers. Who’s minding the store?"},"content":{"rendered":"

My June Life Lines column. It must have struck a chord because I am receiving tons of private emails from total strangers who all have experienced this in one way or another. A rare time when I wish people couldn’t relate to my column. Here you go:<\/em><\/p>\n

Almost 25 years ago, a woman in my family\u2014lifelong Catholic, former folk group singer, fixture at her home parish\u2014walked into a new church in her new town with her boyfriend. They wanted to get married and, although he wasn\u2019t Catholic, her boyfriend had been married before. So they were interested in seeking information about annulment. Simple enough, right? At least at that early stage.<\/p>\n

The parish secretary informed them curtly that they could enroll in the parish and give to the envelope system for three months. Then someone would be willing to talk to them about annulment. My relative walked out of that local church, out of the universal Church, and never looked back. And, quite frankly, I can\u2019t blame her.<\/p>\n

Back then I had hoped this was an isolated incident, a bad day in the life of a parish secretary, but since then I have heard from many people who have experienced similar variations on the same theme. I think of the friend whose infant son needed private baptism immediately because of a life-threatening condition and was told\u2014by the parish secretary, not a priest\u2014 that baptisms are done only on the first and third Sundays of each month at regular Mass, no exceptions. She had to find another church, and fast.<\/p>\n

Again and again adult Catholics\u2014some on the verge of leaving the faith, others on the verge of returning\u2014gingerly try to put their toes over the threshold of a parish, only to get a door slammed in their face. I had assumed this was an American phenomenon, a factor of our over-stressed lives, but just recently\u00a0Pope Francis used his daily homily to address exactly this issue. Apparently it\u2019s a worldwide problem.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what the pope said:<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u201cThink of the good Christians, with good will, we think about the parish secretary\u2026 \u2018Good evening, good morning, the two of us\u2014boyfriend and girlfriend\u2014we want to get married.\u2019 And instead of saying, \u2018That\u2019s great!\u2019 They say, \u2018Oh, well, have a seat. If you want the Mass, it costs a lot\u2026\u2019 This, instead of receiving a good welcome \u2013\u2018It is a good thing to get married!\u2019 But instead they get this response: \u2018Do you have the certificate of baptism, all right\u2026\u2019 And they find a closed door. When this Christian and that Christian has the ability to open a door, thanking God for this fact of a new marriage\u2026We are many times controllers of faith, instead of becoming facilitators of the faith of the people.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

This pope knows exactly what we need to hear. I only hope everyone is listening. And by \u201ceveryone\u201d I don\u2019t mean just the people in the pews. I mean the people who have the power to make decisions that will change stories like this one from the pope\u2019s homily:<\/p>\n

\u201cThink about a single mother who goes to church, in the parish and to the secretary she says: \u2018I want my child baptized.\u2019 And then this Christian says: \u2018No, you cannot because you\u2019re not married!\u2019 But look, this girl who had the courage to carry her pregnancy and not to return her son to the sender, what is it? A closed door! This is not zeal! It is far from the Lord!\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Experiences like these\u2014all too frequent and all too real\u2014drive a wedge between the People of God and the Church, all on the whim of the person at the front desk, all in the name of the letter of the law over the heart of the law.<\/p>\n

\u201cKnock, and the door will be opened to you,\u201d Jesus said. I think he meant any time, not \u201cwhen your papers are in order\u201d or \u201con the first Sunday of the month.\u201d<\/p>\n

The people are hungry for God. Pope Francis knows this. The\u00a0people know this. Not sure how so many others in between missed the memo.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My June Life Lines column. It must have struck a chord because I am receiving tons of private emails from total strangers who all have experienced this in one way […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2519,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[81,121],"tags":[80,101],"class_list":["post-2518","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-faith","category-life-lines","tag-faith","tag-life-lines"],"yoast_head":"\nGetting past Church's gatekeepers. 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